Okay , so who can admit their acts of stupidness. I'll start with yesterday. My son came home from college on his brand new Ninja 250 motorcycle. He called from his cell phone less than 1/2 mile form my house. He had hit some gravel in the hairpin turn and lost it. He tumbled 10 -15 feet and the bike bent the gear selector lever into a u shape. I went down with my truck and we managed to get it in the back and brought it to the house. We took off the lever and with the use of a vise , hammer and pliers managed to get it pretty straightened out . We reinstalled it. My son had several abrasions on his knee , arms and elbow and was pretty sore. So here is the stupid part. I told him I would test the bike and make sure it would still run ok . I haven't been on a motorcycle since med school and fell off then three times before I sold it. I drove it down the road to where he lost it , turned around and drove back. So far so good. The bike seemed fine except for minor cosmetic damage. As I was turning in the damn driveway , I touched the front brake , hit a small patch of gravel and down I went. 300lbs of bike lying on me. At least I wore the damn helmet. After driving up the rest of the driveway I examined the damage. Me .... ankle abrasion , elbow abrasion and left palm scratches. The bike ... bent clutch handle , wheel knocked out of alignment , and additional cosmetic damage. Sadly I went in to tell my son. So the moral is : when you are 51 and were never really good on a bike anyway ......keep the hell off. Stay with the 350Z. So there you go. picture to post later. Who else has a stupid story?

Like father, Like son. I really do argree with you Doc. My dad did the same thing when I was a kid on a skateboard.

look at it this way. I am sure your wife got a good giggle out of it. Sorry to hear about your injuries.

my stupid story. I was digging a garden for my mom and took out a large rock. Tossed it aside right on to a rake which then shot up and whacked me in the head. Just like in the movies.

I once whacked a tennis racquet on top of the net and the racquet bounced back up and nailed me square between the eyes while I was wearing my glasses and knocked me flat. LOL. Boy was I embarassed.

Stuck my tongue to a frozen pole when I was a kid. Talk about something that hurts when I ripped it off!!

I was about 7 years old, playing with the kids next door. I took a small board and put it on a rock like a teeter totter. I add a rock to the down end and hit the top of the board with a hammer, the rock would fly 20 feet, the third time I did this the rock hit me on the left eye, and cut a circle around my eye, I want in the house, Mom came running to see me remove my hand and a handful of blood fall on the kitchen floor. Six stitches.

Not only is this stupid, it is down right dum. Tried to stop two very tall very angry men from fist fighting. How? By stepping in between them. Where is the emoticon with a black eye when you need one?

Try swinging from a vine with nothing but pointy rocks below. 7 stiches in my head later, and I am still here. Although it may answer a lot of questions you peeps have had about me now...

There are too many to list in a small space...

I once decided it would be cool to karate chop a corn cob. Broken hand, which i then played football with and made it even worse.

So what did you do with the sand that was formerly the rocks?
Kidding, Ciggie. Musta hurt like the blue blazes.

As a toddler I bent the tines on a fork so that two of them could be stuck into an electrical outlet on the stove while I was reaching down from above and sticking said tines into the outlet. According to my Mother, she couldn't figure out how I bent the tines and secondly, I looked pretty neat as a flying kid. Landing against the side of the fridge was rough though. Scared the hell outa her and explains MY looniness.

And yes, living in Canada, did the tongue on the cold metal in winter. Door knob. Yeeooowch. Let's face it, some sh!t you really have to do for yourself as a kid.

You feeling the power of electricity DOES explain a lot! Did you log your flight time in your logbook? One things for sure, frozen metal will teach you a lot of things you're not likely to forget!

Ha ha ha. Too true. Ma said I looked like one of the flying Walendas. The one that fell off. Hee hee. Until I crashed. Then she said I just yipped once, shook myself and stood up and walked away. Kids are pretty damn resilient, so I'm told. I was always creating "trouble" but not a bad kid. Never mean but a definite terror of the neighbourhood. "Silent Death" was my knickname. Old people feared a sneak attack by me.

got married

That's definitely a dangerous move on your part. Have you recovered from the trauma yet?

LOL... yes.. i think... wait... i don't know... is random twitching normal?

For whom?? You or the lovely bride? LOL. Kidding, Odie.

Like Bull,there are too many to list,but the first one I can remember was when I was 5.These 2 friends of mine & I used to get on this shed roof via a fence.this was a standard wooden fence & I really don't remember how we got our midget butts on top of the fence to get to the roof but we did.Well,we're coming down & I missed the fence & landed full force on my chin (still have the scar after 52 years).I remember in my minds eye running to the house screaming like a banshee & my Mom meeting me at the back door with a horrified look on her face because blood was streaming through my fingers.She out my head over the washroom sink & finally got the bleeding stopped.That was the first of many.

ps.you don't think it stopped us from getting up there again do you? Not in this lifetime.lol

Nope, you're right. Doesn't stop us from repeat performances with a variation.

bah... i'm divorced now... but it was a stupid act

<repost from the TTZ forums 24 Feb 03>

<it's a long one- go grab a drink in the pub on my tab.....>
OK-- sorry for the delay, folks-- I honestly was in the shower for a LONG time- caked with grease, oil, dirt, and gasoline... then I had to get some work done that the wife reminded me about <actual "for work" work-- brought something home for testing>.

<BTW- I'll have you folks know that I'm only relating this for three reasons: 1) Burner recently said I am "honest to a fault". I had no idea what he meant, but I guess this qualifies. 2) During this entire ordeal, I kept thnking of how it was perfect fodder for the sort of stories Rick Pewe relates in 4X4, or of the sort that are related in R&T's Miscellaneous Ramblings column <really gotta start reading R&T again, if only for that column>, and 3) to completely debunk those who might think or say that I feel I am perfect. HARDLY, folks... I was calling myself everything I've ever called anyone else on this board during the course of this- "idiot, moron, dumbass", and so on- with the exception of "liar". After all-- I was ACTUALLY working on this truck, and I actually own it. >

OK-- where to begin.....

First of all, you need to know I am famous for late-night auto work. Motor mounts, pitman arms, electrical mods, it doesn't matter-- I do some of my best work at night.... and some of my best destressing by way of reflection while doing it.

Now-- some of you who've followed me in the automobile section know that my S-series Blazer is a work in progress, gradually becoming a trail vehicle for offroad/onroad use. Also, along those lines, I am learning to weld.

One of the projects I am working on, is called a set of "slider bars". Perhaps better known as "nerf bars" to the non-wheeling public. Basically- stout structural steel tubing used to keep rocks, stumps, and etc, from modifying the lower half of the body <perhaps to the extent of making the doors non-functional>.

So-- I've got all the welding on my sliders done, with the exception of welding them to the plates which will in turn be bolted to the frame. I was originally going to weld those plates to the frame as well, but saner minds have prevailed. So I'm in the final stages of fabrication and then my sliders will at last be finished- saving me a TON of money, and teaching me a skill at the same time. A worthy goal, to be sure. I'm a real D-I-Y" type of guy, see.... a regular Tim Allen.....

So needless to say- these sliders have to hold upwards of 2 1/2 tons of truck and gear when time comes to use them. This means the mounts have to be BEEFY. I'm making mine out of 5/16" steel angle, 3 1/2X6". Each plate weighs in the neighborhood of 8 pounds, I figure. So I get everything cut and clamped in place, wanting to get 2 of the 3 plates on the driver's side in place today and tapped for bolts. First one goes along and I've got the pilot holes drilled for the plate with no problem. Align the second plate-- wait-- there's a bolt in the way- no problem- take the plate off, mark for the bolt, and take it to the drill press-- 2 minutes later, I've got it clearanced for that bolt.

That bolt is about to play a CRUCIAL part in my dumbassedness, see....

So I jig it all back up, the plate's cleared that bolt, so I start drilling. Through the plate, through the frame, a 1/8" hole. Then another on the bottom, and another beside it. Great.. everything's going great. Man- wonder if they'll ever start building these cordless drills with brushless motors-- this one sure does spark a lot. <Yes, my mind does wander a bit while I'm working on mechanical bits- though not normally in a dangerous fashion>.

So I'm on the last hole... drilldrilldrilldrill.... pop. OK- we're through the plate.... and drilling... we'll be through the chassis any moment now... ok, there we go... hey wait.. this seems to be double-thickness. Ah well.. might as well drill through both sections while I'm here-- still plenty of charge on the battery, and this is the last pilot hole for the evening.

Now-- let me just point out, that I'm working on the driver's side framerail. Of a 1989 Chevy S-10 4X4 Blazer. 4.3L V6, Throttle-body injected motor, and it's brand new, thankyouvery much, as is the transmission behind it. Transfer case might need a little work.....

... now, those of you who are familiar with late-80's GM design philosophy, already are seeing a problem. The rest of you- let's break it down....

89 S-series truck... check.....
GM heavy-duty chassis, boxed from the B-pillar forward... check.....
brand new, "built-it-myself" slider bars- not too far from completion.. just a few more holes in the ... uhh... hey wait.. what did I say that interfering bolt was to?? There must be something, I can't recall......

Oh yes-- it holds the fuel lines against the inside of the frame rail....

About this moment, I pop through that "double-thickness of chassis"......

.... surprise, surprise, it WASN'T a double thickness of chassis. You betcha, kiddies- fuel line. The MAIN fuel line.

- and let's not forget that electrically-noisy, arcin' and sparkin' cordless electric drill I'm using.

I instantly let out what can only be called a scream <well- certainly not "slasher movie chic who's about to lose her head" scream, but "guy who's testicals just jumped into the pit of his stomach due to the proximity of open spark <fire> and gasoline" scream. A sound a guy should never make twice.>. Perhaps a better way to put it would be a "UHH!!", "Yikes!", "Oh F***!" and "please don't let me die like this", all rolled into one.

What makes this REALLY dumb of me, and thus nearly a candidate for the Darwin Award <luckily, not eligible because after all- I AM typing this from the "here", not the "after">, is that not one week ago I looked at that darn bolt and made a note to myself- "remember to unbolt that fuel line when you drill those holes. Don't want to go drilling into it or anything". And yet, what do I do in my Zen-like "wrenchin' session after work", but go surging ahead and forget all about it <I've REALLY got to quit reading books like "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance".. a bad influence, for a gearhead and philosopher all in one.>

So gasoline is POURING out of my frame rail. Wouldn't you know, I just got a full tank of gas, too? I just kinda sit there for a second- I've stopped the drill, it sparked like crazy as it always does when I suddenly let off the trigger, I smell raw fuel pouring out of the frame and am looking at a constant stream. Why am I still alive? *AM* I still alive.... maybe this is the aftermath- I'm actually in a fireball and am already dead and shuffling off this mortal coil <I DID say I'm into philosophy..>. So what do I do after about 30 seconds of sitting there, shocked? Well, other than a soft Stewart-esque murmur of "Nooooooo!" <MadTV reference>, I literally get up, walk inside the apartment and have ths conversation:

Me: "Honey-- I'm about to ask you the wierdest question I've ever asked you- just answer it, ok?"
Wife: " Oh there's a tall order.... "
Me: "Just answer the question, ok?- You see me.. right? I'm here talking to you?"
Wife <looking at me like I just stepped off the mother ship>: "Uh.. Yeeeeah..."
Me: "OK-- just checking.. I accidentally drilled into the gas line and there were lots of sparks from the drill when I realized, and frankly I can't figure out why it didn't ignite the vapors"....

<no folks, I am not normally that... ditzy. You should know, though- that I am basically petrified of working with raw fuel. All it takes is one stuck fastener and a momentary lapse of patience followed by a blow with a steel hammer- sparks.. and you're history. Rebuild a motor? Sure thing. Transmission? No problem, got a book? Modify a suspension- I can do it. Change a fuel pump or a fuel filter? I get .....VERY... deliberate... and ... slow. Patient, even-- which I'm sure you must realize by now is a VERY unusual state of mind for me....>

So- to wrap this overly-long story up-- 3 hours, 2 trips to the local parts store, $8 and about 75 pounds of cat litter later, I'm done. All told, only lost about 2 1/2 gallons of fuel. Not too bad, I suppose.

- and it all could have been avoided by a little common sense, which I'd already made note of.

</snip>

for the record, I have changed out two fuel systems on my Jeep and the wife's ZJ, since this, with no problems.

Thanks BK. Suddenly I feel a lot smarter than before.

LOL. I wouldn't use his behavior as a vaulting box to a higher level doc. Or anyone else's for that matter. We are all both smart and dumb most of the time. All depends on what and whether we give in to dumb impulses and ill-considered ideas.

Hmm still thinking whether accepting Harvey the cat was a stupid move.....

Nope, you did it out of kindness and a love of animals. Never dumb.

Thanks mate! ...now I know......I join the 4Peeps! <Goof Looking now!>

Had a co-worker who was cutting a copper pipe in his house that he thought was a water line. He stopped for some reason and checked and found out it was a natural gas line. Very lucky he didnt blow himself and his house up.

"Harvey THE CAT"

draw your own conclusions. I did.

I'm thinkin Kitty Flambe!!!

ROFL... good call... *POOF!*

Get lost Burnkat!

Not stupid enough to write it here!~

Then again that's not entirely true... LOL

gasoline, bonfires, and eyebrows do not mix... nuf said.

I would hesitate to even mention all the fire stories I have had in the past. I would say at least 5-10 times. One cost my father quite a bit in repairs to a neighbor's house and that was when I was only 6.

Yes, yes it does.

Years ago in a physics lesson at school we were supposed to be measuring the specific heat of paraffin. This involved using a small electrical element to warm the paraffin up and measuring the current used vs the temerature rise. Simple eh? Even a child could do it. 'Cept for this child.

I messed up the readings and decided to start over. I took the heater out of the paraffin and put it on the desk to allow the paraffin to cool. Unfortunately I neglected to turn off the current to the heating element. (Can you see where this is going?)

Ten minutes later I stick the (by now very hot) heater back into the beaker of paraffin and WHOOOMPH!! A blast of flame shoots right past my face and the beaker settles down to burn. Luckily I'd kept hold of the heater and jerked it out of the beaker as it went up. As images of the school burning down passed in front of my eyes I blew into the beaker and the flames went out. Not a soul noticed my Darwin moment!

And to prove I have a problem with liquid fuels, a few years later I tried to carry a small amount of petrol across a garage forecourt in a polystyrene cup. The petrol dissolved the cup in short order.

Oh, and there was the time I hit a golf ball at the shed in my mum's back yard. Took out the glass in the next door neighbour's greenhouse, behind me. Still ranks as the best golf shot I've ever played.

My first job part time whilst I was at college it was a big DIY store.

I lifted up a 4ft fence with fence posts attached either side, got it above head height as I was lifting it over something, the post fell off hit me in the head, I thought nothing off it until I had blood pooring down my face and covering my nice white shirt. I made it to the toilet and passed out hitting the sink with my head again.

Ended up getting an xray at hospital and the afternoon off work

1 more, got electrocuted in my last job, I fell on to the back of an old 9 track drive which was in poor condition as they don't make these anymore anyway I don't know what happened but I got a big electric shock and was thrown out of the cabinet, the following day my boss did the same

Well at least the boss did it also.

Tried to fix the hairdryer when it is plugged in......got a nice shoccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnggggggggg moment!

Hmm, I can't think of anything.....



apart from when i was 3 or 4, playing with a parafin lighter in the lounge, got hot, dropped it on sofa, WHoOoooosh, sofa goes up in flames....

apart from that, i can't think of anything, unless TGM can recall anything that my mind has removed

Do you "couch" things in different terms now that you've experienced your own version of a hot seat?

I remember coming home from a school trip to find you'd tried to burn the house down. Little brothers eh?

£50 will seal my lips regarding any other daft actions you may have perpetrated over the years......

<Hastily scribbles out cheque for 100 pounds Sterling to TGM.> Tell all, I won't blab.

Ditto....

Ooo, a fellow data miner.

It is against the law to run Natural Gas in a copper line, it causes flakeing in the line and failure of the line.

See you learn stuff every day here.

What is it supposed to be?. I am sure(but not quite) that my old house had copper pipes for gas.

One time in my life I grab this girl's, who was a pretty good friend at the time, ass. That was the one and only ass I have ever grabbed. My God did that blow up in my face. She didn't say anything at the time but I almost got kicked out of school for it and all her girlfriends started to spread rumors that I was a very dangerous sexual predator on the loose and that every girl should watch out when they are around me. So by the end to the year everybody hated me except for a few friends. I ended up leaving that school that year. Everyone would torment me every day. I learned my lesson after that. In fact I was afraid to even make eye contact with girls for like 2 years after that. That was one of the most stupid things I have ever done.

Ouch, a very painful but useful lesson.