You can be born into various circumstance that are not very charming, nor conducive to the quality of life, or a long one. Fortunately, you can change these relationships, e.g., Helen Keller is a great example of courage, and determination to change the world she was born into, and serves as an inspiration to others.
There are ways that a persons' quality of life can be changed, among them for example, is helping those less fortunate intellectually, physically, and lastly economically. Just being kind, and honest with others is a good way to start. Not all wish you ill, or want to tear your heart out ... physically or romantically. The point is, that one can change the direction they are going if they wish, and a good place to start is to stop thinking about the self, i.e., to the extent that you forget about others.
Questions of fate seem more probmatic than not, but it does seem to follow that checking out what one is about to under take in life, e.g., steping down on icy steps, in the dark of night with poor visability, seems a resonable starting point-like a flashlight.
To the question of God, I personally have never participated in a two way converstation, usually prayer is one way. Yet, some friends, and others are more metaphysical then I, and have had fortunately these experiences. Obviously, there is some credibility in their actions and experiences since they have not been netted, and carted off to the funny farm for hearing voices ... in psycharitary 101 hearing voices is a no-no and the key to the cushioned room-so puzzel that one.
Finally, in terms of life being a downer and so, do not have a predetermined order of things-but do find good people in some strange places, and hope to reflect the same. Have fun. Df.